To be the First

When I told my grandmother that I would be spending a week in Italy, she replied by saying, “you’re living my dreams.” I carried those words very close to me but the weight became straining the more I dwelt on them. I never knew how much it would affect me to be the first in my family to walk in such parts of the world. 

I made it to Trieste on my birthday. I spent my 20th birthday in Italy but couldn’t get my heavy heart to lighten up. Everywhere I went, I continued to tell myself how much my parents and grandparents should be here. I wished for them to see what my eye could see. I would’ve given anything to let them be in my shoes. I spent my birthday with exhaustion and guilt eating away at me. But just as I was making my way to eat dinner, I saw the bright, red light of the sun. It was one of the most beautiful sights I had ever seen. Without much thought, I began running to the horizon to witness this beauty in fullness. Along with my classmate, we tried to get to the pier before the sun slipped away from us. Unfortunately, the sun would not wait for us and we watched as the very tip of it disappear. I was aware we were both a little disappointed in missing it but the only thing I could say in the moment was, “the sun will set again tomorrow. We’ll have another chance.”

Walking through Trieste, I made a note to myself that a vacation to Italy would be best during a month that wasn’t so hot. Little notes that I would tell my family for when they plan their trip to Italy. If they were to come sometime other than the middle of summer, they could avoid the unforgiving heat of this Italian sun. Just like this I continued making more notes. Buses are not faster than walking. Dinner at restaurants begins really late. Tipping is already included in the bill. Gelato is a must. Italian is a lot different in comparison to Spanish. In this way, it felt like I was doing something for them. Something to be able to take home with me and share. This was a way for me to fuel their dreams of traveling as they had done for me.

Venice was much more difficult than Trieste. It was much more crowded with people and my body was very tired, even more so from the heat. But I still couldn’t believe that I was somewhere so far away from my own reality. It’s just so hard to comprehend how I was even able to be there in the first place. It’s somewhere I would’ve never imagined I’d get to be at. Despite how difficult it was for me physically, I am so grateful I had the opportunity to step foot in a place so many people dream of visiting.  

Again for my family, I began with making notes to share. Boats are the only source of transportation. Not even bikes were used on the islands, only walking. The ‘streets’ are very narrow and sometimes you’ll have to go through a small crevice to get to your destination. Venice is somewhat sinking (?). There are a lot of stairs and bridges to cross, good walking shoes are required. The architecture is lovely. The museums are worth the experience. The food is absolutely amazing. Mosquitoes are relentless.

Venice was also the place I did the most gift shopping for my family. I managed to find great gifts that would suit their individuals tastes and got to walk into a lot of shops to see what Venice has to offer. 

Overall, my trip in Italy was short but will remain long-lived in my memories. It was a trip that dug at my inner feelings but encouraged my growth. Just like the sunset in Trieste, I will chase after my dreams that shine so beautifully. I want my time that I had exploring the world to be of inspiration to someone else. Even for my family. Even if they don’t believe they’ll get the chance, I want to motivate them until they believe they will. I want to give them hope and fuel their aspirations. Again and again, I want to pester them to want to step into the world. I want everything that I experienced given to them. The sun will set again tomorrow. We’ll always have another chance. 

Victoria Morales Vargas